I find myself at yet another airport. This time, I’m in Detroit.
And I’m leaving Michigan for a second time. This time, I’m feeling really good about it.
When I got back to Michigan, I was in a state of shock for the first few days.
I couldn’t believe that I was back at the place I subconsciously had turned into my home.
Back in 2019, I actually became a suburban person (surprisingly enough). I had found it so hard to adjust to Michigan’s lifestyle back then – yet I did.
And now, I’m not that person anymore and I no longer consider Michigan my home – I wish it was.
I wish I could make a home out of Michigan for myself; live a simple life, buy a house, have a regular job and make money, marry the man I really want and have a family (I want to adopt). I wish I could have all these things – but I’m only 22 and I’m a chaotic person.
I admire suburban people. I wish I was more like them with their comfortable homes and big cars. I wish I was an outdoors person who hunts and goes fishing and goes camping. But that’s not me (at least not right now). Their lives are calmer than city life or island life and I bet they appreciate people more.
I know that I’m young, growing, and still figuring out what I want – and right now, I don’t want to live a simple life (I know that might sound wrong)! I might want that later on but for now, I want to be young and embrace the chaos of being young.
What I’m sure of is that there’s always risk in life with whatever decisions we choose to make and we can’t always be secure in our decisions.
The “how” will unfold on its own.
How I’m Feeling Now
Last time I was at Detroit-Wayne airport waiting for my flight to NYC, I felt absolutely horrible. I was leaving a home behind.
And now, I’m leaving Michigan behind. It’s behind me for good.
I’m relieved because I can now focus on what it is I want in this next year of my life.
I can now focus on this version of me instead of wanting to be that 2019 version of me.
The dead have been buried. Mission complete.
I will miss the people I love who live here in Michigan. I will miss the simplicity. And I will miss the nature.
Maybe Michigan will be my getaway just like Hemingway’s – a place to visit to get away from the city-life.
Yet, the future is unknown and unexpected – I’d rather live in the present and build on that.
So, this is my final goodbye, Michigan.
Have a goo’ one. Who knows when we’ll meet again.